my only one :D

Sunday, October 29, 2006

im sick & tired to be nice to them, yet they come kp me. so what if i retain? must all of them give me cold shoulders and all? does it mean im asking for money when i tried to be nice to them?! does it mean i hate staying at home when i go out and study even exams are OVER?!
and, darling, u says u wish our daughter will not be like me. alrights, you still can choose your fate. it ain't too late for youu. & i think, u should know what i mean. you says isnt too late for me to amend. lols' and i dun think so. i tried to be nice over the phone when u called me to. it's beyond my limits to be nice when they come shouting for nothing. they'll never know even if ii care (: so be it. maybe, this is my way of caring for them. it doesnt need to be shown anyway. whatever they think and assume; so be it.

I try to make a sound,
but no one hears me.
I'm slipping off the edge,
I'm hanging by a thread,
I wanna start this over again.

feel my love at 10:19 PM

Saturday, October 28, 2006

went orchard and bugis with gan-ma, & sis joined in later. wore heels for the first time & shopped till ii drop. so, ii bought :
-one black t-shirt from heeren; $49 [but its nice :D]
-one "jap style" collar shirt; $16.90 -one white t-shirt from bugis; $10 [cheap yet nice`]
-AND, 1 pair of earring from bugis street; $2
OH. and somemore other things; $58

not bad larhs. im happy today, cause ii bought quite alot of things. :D
but darling is still @ his halloween party -.-
he must be VERY tired. cause, ytd night he did something for ME till very late. ):
wonder what's that. hehhhs` iloveyouu <3>
& surprisingly; veron msged me and say "evry thursday go swimming."
_warhs. impressed`

feel my love at 10:36 PM

Friday, October 27, 2006

after they graduate in the yr 07, what am ii gonna do? to retain, to graduate one yr later than them is something really terrible. imagine;
without them during recess,
no more familiar faces occupying the whole rows of benches,
no more craps, laughters & screamings during recess,
no more so called " tables rules" ,
no more morning gatherings at the bball court,
no more "sports meet" evry friday.
manns. this is terrible. different prom..withnessing them going off w/o me.
imagine start of 2007, i gonna live independently w/o them. ii dun want. ii gonna be so not used to it.
ii want to graduate withh them. to share the same prom night. to share the same class next yr. ):
but this not gonna happen anymore.
(: i love youu guys.
__truly ii do. <3

feel my love at 11:36 PM

Thursday, October 26, 2006

EVE was late! hars. im so much earlier than her (: still dare remind me not to be late -.- then mrt-ed to orchard, actually planned to eat sakae at cinneleisure. but bo lehh. then anyhow, went sakura. sounds so ... but okay larhs. ate fresh oyster withh lemon for the 1st time ! :D eve kia then dun dare try. LOLS` then..meet up with ginna. she got a nice taste of dressing. :D then ii had an extreme makeover. LOLS.but remembered only bought $70 out. then asked dar to transfer another 100bucks to me. :DD lols. thanks dar` so shopped, and tried like nobody's business; bought one kinda of..top? ii dunno -.- then belt from 77thstreet. think its nice. :DD but nv did buy any accessories. ): suchh a pity. then..jinyi said she's hungry. then went to sushui tei" @ paragon. but most of the time there, she's bio-ing that guy called..brady tan? the manager- dun think its shaui larhs. just that the hair is nice. but..she loves him -.- LOLS. kaes. go on, walked damn far down far east. intend to take bus. but..we dun see any bus stop there. LOLS. so, bo pian. dragged our feet down. manns, tiring. went level by level to search for nice heels. but..fail -.- THEN, last level, zhun zhun got one nice one. then i bought "milky white" heels, & eve bought a pair of black ones. hehhs. our first time wearing heels lehh ! :D lols. blahh. still, i dun think its enoughh. (: hint hint* next time must drag someone like jinyi out. :D but i doubt jinyi would want to go out withh me lerhs. ): cause ii too troublesome. LOLs. kept on saying my skirt is long. omg..when i think its short. :D later shorter ahh, my mama gonna kill me -.='' then..around 5plus 6, dar finishh work. then eve and jinyi went home, while ii walked to wisma to wait for him. :D then went collect my phone. watchh mr.bean, quite entertaining. LOLS. then went eat dinner. dimsum, rice-noodles,tom-yum soap & raw beef soup. LOLs. went on withh library @ orchard. im like so hyper. then mrt-ed home. yeah. got scoldings when ii got home. -.- dumb enoughh. all for today. and eve is right, i still can feel the ache -.='' ii cant upload images! im having problems with my blog. )': eve, help !

feel my love at 10:09 PM

Wednesday, October 25, 2006

my new blog. (: THANK YOU EVELYNN ! :DD well, so muchh to blog today. gonna be long-winded. hais.
tmr, gonna be speech day. the real BIG event whichh ii really looked forward to. and; im already in the GOH contigent lerh. supposingly, ii should looked forward to it. but, (: i dun. maybe its because, ii didnt fight all the way for it. maybe, ii dun deserve a place in it at all. my fellow eagles cadets fought so hard for it, and yet, was not selected on the 6thsept. as for me, i told a lie- that i went for holiday. and..mr tan was so kind to me. and let me went into the contigent. up to me if ii can kick out one of them. manns. i did it, by kickingg my best pal in class- michelle. now that we had rehearsals almost ev'ryday for speech day, & alvin,jiaying are the reserves. im guilty somehow. and, iim not going for tmr's speech day. (: many thought that im sick. no doubt im sick, i can still make it. but, becus..the place in GOH dun even belong to me in the first place, why should ii be there tmr? (: maybe, alvin could replace me. ii know the feelingg of being taken out of the squat, and being a reserve. ii dun want any of my friends to share the feeling i had before. (: esp alvin. the one who cheered me up when im down. LOLs. yeahh. alvin gn. thanks (:
secondly, ii retained. comfirm 3e6 next yr. actually, ii thought if ii study hard enoughh, ii gonna make it to 4e next yr. but, im wrong larhs. (: maybe, like someone of youu say..studied in the wrong way? maybe, ii dun really ought to be promtoed barh. slacked thruout the yr till june then start to panic. LOLS. but still, i did tried my best. (: esp for maths. LOLS`still failed -.- importantly, i dun bear to leave my onesevenfourians. ii wanna promote withh them, and to graduate withh them. i wanna share the same prom night withh them, also, withh the current 3e4. though 3e4 is make up withh gl and fcukers, still, majority of them are angels. (: thankful to know joel, shaohui,ann,ishqi,michelle,leonard,eugene and loads more peeps. glad to be withh the BIGGEST gang in whole sec3- 174.ii love them loads. well, ii dunno how to face my family & all (: im afraid.
thirdly; MUMMY, im sorry. know that i've let youu down all the while. know that i've being giving u problems and all, never did show youu my care and concern. now that i retain, u didnt blame me muchh too. this makes me more guilty. ): i didnt dared to. didnt dared to apologize even when im in the wrong. maybe, im coward. didnt dare to admit my mistakes and all. ii cant put down my egos in front of youu. and becus of that, i often disappoint youu. still, iloveyou,mummy. take care of youself when you're ill. sprain wrist lerhs, must auto yi dian. dun take those heavy stuff. all i long for, is to have a mummy, one who will spend more time withh me- so that..we can be closer?! -.-
next up - darlingg. the one who showed me love and care all this while. the one who cheered me up by appearing in front of me when im down, no matter how late his school end. (: the guy who has been the strength in me all this while. the one who makes my life worthwhile. know that im someone full of lame crap and all, u still can stand me. LOLS. (: xie xie ni. sorry if ii had piss you off recently, due to all the bad moods im in -.- dunno what the future holds for us, but still, im thankful. :D though, it has been three long years, still, wo hen ai ni. <3>
LASTLY, those who kana promtoted, jiayouuus for next yr's o's :D i love youu guys.

feel my love at 10:37 PM